charles bronson (the cat) debuted two years ago today - the merriest of birthdays to you, my rolling blackout! may your houseflies always be slow and gullible.
i'm not at the stage where i celebrate pet holidays, mind you, but it's very exciting to remember a date in a timely fashion. i was thrilled about my three year anniversary last month, but it appears to fall on april nineteenth. i think i'm twenty-three, but i count on my fingers every now and again to be sure. in lieu of useful things, i remember gems like a japanese song from second grade and my ex-boyfriend's parents' phone number in antibes.
partial solution: randomize gift-giving. nix hiding and forgetting presents, start unbirthdaying without cause. this could get me past my inability to keep surprises secret, as well - altogether, i'm very optimistic. a fine day to everyone, then. if i have your address, look out.
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